When Your Abuser Needs You to Become Their Caregiver — with Psychotherapist Stephanie Muskat
Caregiving is complicated. Caring for someone who has hurt you can be even more so. How do you protect yourself while caring for someone who caused you harm?
For people caring for a parent, family member or other care recipient with whom they have a complicated or painful history, the emotional weight can be even greater. How do you step into a caregiving role without ignoring what happened in the past or sacrificing your own wellbeing?
In this episode of The Hart of It All, Teri Hart speaks with registered social worker, psychotherapist and Compassion in Caregiving founder Stephanie Muskat about navigating caregiving when the relationship is anything but simple.
Stephanie explains why caregiving does not have to mean reconciliation or unlimited access, and how understanding your own values can help you decide what role, if any, you want to play. She shares practical strategies for setting boundaries, preparing for difficult interactions and recognizing when guilt or shame is pushing you beyond the limits you have set for yourself.
Teri and Stephanie also explore how dementia can further complicate already difficult family dynamics, why conversations about the past may not always bring the closure caregivers hope for, and how sibling relationships can become another source of tension when caregiving responsibilities are uneven.
Drawing on both her professional expertise and her own years of experience as a caregiver, Stephanie offers a different way to think about boundaries: not as rigid walls, but as limits that allow caregivers to continually ask themselves what they need, what they can realistically give and why they are making the choices they are making.
Not every care recipient is a “loved one,” and caregiving should not require losing yourself in the process.
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Resources:
Follow Stephanie Muskat:
Website: http://www.compassionincaregiving.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/compassionincaregiving
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@compassionincaregiving
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/compassionincaregiving
To watch this episode, subscribe to The Hart Of It All's YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@TheHartofitAllPod
Follow The Hart Of It All:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thehartofitallpod/
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Follow Teri Hart:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/terihart
Co-Executive Produced by: Carrie Hayden & Jess Carroll of 6of1 Digital
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/6of1digital
I’m here to share stories and conversations, not medical or professional advice. I’m not a doctor, therapist, or licensed professional, and this podcast is NOT a substitute for guidance from qualified experts. Please seek out professional support when you need it. Take care and I’ll see you in the next episode.
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🟡 About The Hart of it All
A podcast about navigating the realities of caregiving.
No one should have to do it alone. That’s the heart behind The Hart of It All, hosted by Canadian broadcaster Teri Hart. Inspired by her own experience caring for her dad and helping her mom navigate a new reality, Teri shines a light on the stories, resources, and conversations caregivers need most.
From doctors and nutritionists to fellow caregivers living it every day, each episode offers guidance and connection. Honest, supportive, and grounded in lived experience, The Hart of It All is here to remind us that caring for each other is something we’re all in together.
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